The blame episode 8

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TO cut the whole story short approximately one and six months after my first meeting
with Adeleke I began to notice some changes in me, I became fairer, easily irritated, nausea most time, sleeping unnecessarily, yeah your guess is as good as mine, am pregnant, I was doubting at first but after I bought the pregnancy kit and it confirmed it. I have been bottling it up in me until I heard the call from home that the Father of my unborn child is sick not just sick but seriously sick.

Yetunde came back home on seeing me she burst into tears, yetunde crying what could be the cause?

Temmy: bestie what’s wrong, why the tears?

Yetunde: (sobbing profusely) Temmy it’s leke, leke has been confirmed dead but before his death threats diagnosis that was carried out by the doctor showed that is is hiv/aids positive.

On hearing this,  I smiled I didn’t get was she was saying at first, after like a minute then the implication of what she said dawned on me,  you see that scream came from nowhere I screamed like I was thrown in this deep hot fiery furnace, it attracted the attention of those around our room, the last thing I remembered was people rushing in, the rest was blur I sank into this abyss of darkness

I woke up to a strange environment, feeling a dull pain on my head. I felt someone hand on mine, it was my mother, tears were flowing down on her eyes freely when she saw I saw fully awake she began to talk.

Mommy: Temilade is this how you have decided to pay me back despite all my toils, sweat over you, is this how you have decided to pay me back.

I was numbed with misery I could cry no more, I was just listening to her my eyes were staring into space, my eyes were unfocused my mother went on.

Mommy: since you have fully satisfied yourself with what you want am sure you must be happy by now. Let me tell you, you are pregnant not only that the doctor also said you are with the deadly disease hiv/aids. How did you come about all these things?  Who is responsible?  Temilade are you deaf I need an answer, Temilade Temilade Temi lade!!! 

MA was my response, mom am sorry for what I have done to you I know you don’t deserve this shame and reproach I have brought on you and myself, I never knew it was going to end this way, Adeleke is responsible for my pregnancy he is the only one I have slept with, Mom and sorry I know you can never forgive me, just please leave me alone,  I don’t deserve you.

Mommy: yes you don’t worth to be called my daughter, I disown you as from now on go to wherever you deem fit, you can go to meet adeleke in the world beyond I care less, Temilade  I cause the day I conceived and gave birth to you, never come back home, I have paid your hospital bills once you are discharged don’t come home to me. My dreams of becoming mama lawyer all gone, I have resigned myself to fate, it would have been better if I had never conceived you than giving birth to you and you ending this way. Goodbye Temilade I curse you!!!

You all now no. My story, I brought misfortune on my destiny, all my hopes and aspirations all down in the drain, THE BLAME. Who’s to be blame for this?  Is it me or Yetunde that introduced me to Adeleke or the late Adeleke himself?  Can I ever make it anymore in this life?  My mother has disowned me, the father of my unborn child dead, my education will be stopped. Should I just end it all, gave me something to cure this pain, I so much detest this body. Who will save me from myself?  I just need you all to tell me is this how it is really meant to me or through my own making.
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